So this my attempt of blogging via my blackberry. See if it works. Currently I'm covering a lunch at the gas station and that consists of doing nothing but sitting in a chair staring out the window. So I thought I'd make better use of my time.
I quit Sam's Club. I can't explain to you how much lighter I feel. Even though technically I don't have a real source of income after next Thursday I'm really not that worried. I have faith that things will work out. That job was killing me in more ways than one. Going on retreat for a few days last month made me see that even more. It was like God reached down to me and told me it was okay to leave. That I didn't need to stress so much about everything. I'll be okay. In the end I always am.
Now if only I could stop my anxiety about other things because I seriously drive myself crazy. I've never wanted anything so much. I want to speed up time and slow it down all at once. It's stupid of me at 20 to feel like I'm getting old. But then again maybe it's because I don't feel just 20. I feel older. I feel ready. No, I am ready. And that's the hard part. Being the only one ready and just having to wait. And perhaps worse not even knowing how long this waiting period will last.
I have a lot of faith in Christ. But I need more, because I'm still a little scared.
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