I'm not exactly sure why but I was set apart for some reason. I was granted a gift that I truly do cherish. God reached down from Heaven and held a scared, broken and lonely 12 year old on a dark night in an empty park and planted faith in my heart. My life is supposed to mean something. Scratch that. My life does mean something.
I received the anointing of the sick today before mass. Father Greg before he started asked me how I was holding up. I answered him with a weak smile. He smiled at me back, but his smile was much more genuine than mine. He looked me in the eyes and said "Stephanie, youre strong and probably handling this better than anyone else is. They're all a mess but you have faith. But you always have. You're stronger than all of them. Your faith is deeper." I almost argued but I didn't. I just prayed to be healed. I didn't know how to take Father Greg's words anyway.
During mass I was hit with an enormous amount of pain. All my strength went into me not crying out in pain. But I just prayed. And I offered it up. Let my suffering mean something, please.
After mass I went to my parents. I can't explain how much pain was inflicted upon me in there. I'm so incredibly hurt. Yet as much as I can say that I do I know that it isn't true. I love you. And what I feel for you is sadness because something in your life hurt you and affected you to make you treat me this way. May God grant you peace.
Christ have mercy.
You, my dear, are more amazing than you realize. You do have such an amazing strength, and know that you aren't carrying this cross alone-God is walking right beside you through it all. And even I, the little I can, am trying to help you carry your cross. I'd take it all if I could<3 I love you and admire you.
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