I'm not sure exactly what happened tonight but my world fell apart. The little fortress that I had up crumbled. Everything hit me at once and I panicked. I could barely move and all I wanted was to roll up and die. And honestly, that's an understatement. Erin called me and as soon as I heard her voice I could no longer hold my tears back. Which is comforting, in a way. I like feeling safe with her, as though there is no need for false pretenses. But all of this is beside the point. I went downstairs and I saw a letter on my kitchen counter for me. Problem was it was addressed in my handwriting. I saw it and I got angry because I knew what was in the letter. Or at least I thought I did. I text Erin and she told me to read it. I hesitated but sort of like usual, I listened to her. Thank God for Erin. Literally. And thank God for the words that I read.
Dear Stephanie,
My beloved daughter, I love you. You are so precious and beautiful to me. Why is it though that you doubt your self worth so much? Did I not create you in my image? Did I not die for you? My child I adore you. Trust in that. I do not make mistakes; you are not an exception. Continue to cultivate your gifts. I know you are confused right now but trust in my will. Allow me to guide you and show you the way. Be patient. Take time to acknowledge each and every day. Let the past be the past and let me take care of the future. Pray without ceasing. Visit me in the adoration chapel. Never stop loving me. I will never stop loving you. I will not forsake you.
I love you,
Jesus
I did not expect any of that.
I can't even begin to explain how insanely moving that is and how awestruck I am. I figured it was a pretty awesome letter but there is NO doubt that, that letter showing up and you noticing at that time was God.
ReplyDeleteI am so very glad that you have that letter as a reminder of God's love and I am so glad that you opened it and read it. You are a great work of God, a beautiful lady, an inspiration, and an example. I love you Best Friend.<3